Subject: The Top 15 Things Overheard at Medieval Medical School
15> "Today class, let's open our convicted criminals to rib two."
14> "Don't bite it! You need to swallow it alive for it to work!"
13> "They should translate these obscure medical terms into
something easy, like Latin."
12> "It may seem like pointless superstition to you youngsters,
but I haven't washed these hands since my first delivery
37 years ago."
11> "What do you mean we're out of wild boar snout?!?"
10> "Headache? Take two spotted salamanders and call me in the
morning."
9> "Arthur, Schmarthur. What kind of insurance dost thou have?"
8> "Verily, it would seem our instructor Master Bush knoweth not
the name of *any* disease!"
7> "Goodwoman Thurmond, to you a son is born. 'Strom' shall he
be called."
6> "Put down that dwarf and hand me the pliers!"
5> "Now, remove the speculum from the fire and insert it thusly..."
4> "No, no, push that yellow stuff back in. That's pus from the
*good* fairy!"
3> "Good knight, thy skill at treating boils is unsurpassed in
all the kingdom! Thou shalt be called 'Sir Lance-a-lot'."
2> "Come now Hypoglycies, how can too much sugar possibly be bad
for you?"
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Thing
Overheard at Medieval Medical School...
1> "Gesundheit! Now be sure to wipe that off his liver."
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From: "Ed Meskys" <edmeskys at localnet.com>
Subject: medieval medical school
Date: Sun, 23 Nov 2003 17:06:31 -0500
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