Dragaera

Vlad Interview Questions -- Final Version

Fri Jul 19 22:25:45 PDT 2002

At 02:38 AM 7/19/2002 -0500, Matthew Hunter wrote:
>On Thu, Jul 18, 2002 at 04:08:19AM -0700, Steven Brust 
><skzb at dreamcafe.com> wrote:
> > At 10:11 PM 7/17/2002 -0500, Matthew Hunter wrote:
>
>The Official Press Questionaire for Vlad Taltos, (ex-)Baronet of
>the Jhereg, Imperial Count of Some Nameless Area he's never
>visited, etc:
>
>0) Is this thing on?   Testing, testing, 1 2 3...
>
>1) You go through life-threatening adventures on a regular basis,
>while the tales of your exploits are presented to others as witty
>entertainment, even a measure of comedy.  Does this bother you?

<Doesn't answer, just pulls out a handful of Imperials and smiles inscrutably>

>
>Do you have anything to say, directly, to those people who are
>following your adventures as an evening's passtime?

No.

>   Are you
>comfortable existing as a role-model for a generation of foreign
>children?

Comfortable?  <shrugs>  I make a living.

>2) What *really* happened to your finger?

Which finger?  My middle finger is fine.  See?

>3) No, no, the TRUTH about your finger?

The middle finger on my other hand is also working well.

>4) How do you feel about being a fa-... oh, no, that would be
>rude.

Don't be rude.

>5) Are you aware that your "publisher" (or perhaps publicist?)
>is working with another individual, one "Paarfi", whose tales are
>in direct competition with yours?  (If so, is Paarfi perhaps
>slated for elimination? ;))

I don't think that's any of my business.

>6) In some of your tales, you have mentioned suspicions that
>your memory had been altered at some point.  You have so far
>failed to follow up on these allegations.  Did it slip your
>mind?

You go investigate.  Tell me what you find out.

>7) There are a few scenes (before you met Cawti) which could be
>read to imply a certain amount of romantic tension between
>yourself and Kiera.  Any comment?

You're dreaming, boy.

>8) Following your realization concerning Kiera and Sethra, have
>you given any further thought to the events early in your life
>which brought you into contact with Sethra, Morrolan, et al?

Yes.  A lot.

>8a) And having come to said realization, how did that make you
>feel about the certain amount of romantic tension? (Just how dead
>and How UNdead, is she???)

I came to the conclusion that you must be dreaming.

>9) Some of your fans have speculated that Kragar is Mario.
>Does this speculation... concern you in any way?

Tell Kragar.  He'll get a kick out of it.

>10) There have been accusations that you are an unreliable
>narrator, and occasionally shade the truth in your favor.
>Any comment?

I have never told anything except the truth, the whole truth, and nothing 
but the truth, and if this statement isn't true, may Verra strike you dead.

>11) This next question is for the reptiles.  Is Vlad really as
>smart as he thinks he is?

Loiosh knows better than to answer that question.

>12) Mr. Taltos: Have you ever wondered if memories of your
>past incarnation affect how some of your acquaintences
>deal with you?  If so, why haven't you gone to see
>Sethra about that past life?

Why ask a question if you don't want the answer?

>13) Have you visited any of the lands you rule during your
>recent travels?  Do you plan to?

I haven't yet.  I might one of these days.

>   Would you know if you had?

So, let me get this straight: You are wondering if my mind has been 
tampered with?  And you're the one conducting an interview with a fictional 
character?